the art of overanalyzation.

I don't like you anymore....that much.
I don't think about you....as much as I used to.
Is it wrong....for me being "over you" to smile everytime a memory of us holding hands flashes into my mind?
Is it bad that everytime you say my name, my knees still get weak, and the butterflies take off, and my mind starts reeling...? What would have happened if you wouldn't have made the stupidest decision of your life that you will undoubtedly always regret, hmm? Do you ever wonder like I do? What did you think when we ran into each other at the grocery store? "Whoa! She's not wearing makeup! Haha, ugly, ugly, ugly." or "God, I miss her. I can't get past her eyes, her smile, her beauty...her." I thought about how I can finally admit that I, too, as perfect as I am (haha, sarcasm) made mistakes. I was shy. I was scared. I didn't wanna lose you again, and I didn't know how to act or what to say...because what if I said the wrong thing and you broke up with me? I guess I didn't say enough...
Though I never refused to hold your hand, go to the movies...nor did I cheat on you with Chase...? YOU hardly ever texted me back. YOU never answered when I asked to go to the movies with you. YOU flirted. YOU cheated. I know. I have connections.
I have forgiveness.
But that hardly means that you don't drive me absolutely insane! One minute you're in love with one girl, the next you're like, "Nahh, I like Lainey today!" And then you decide to go out with another girl...and I respect that you're trying your very hardest to replace me, but it'll never work. See, I'm different than every girl in our school. And there are HUNDREDS of girls in our school. But I stand out. I know it.
I'm not perfect. But I'm different. And you like it! HA!
:D
And it's cool that we can still be...cool. We gave it our best shot. Twice.


Now the big question is....does history really repeat itself?



I hope so.